Doing what I came to do.

I'm sitting at a little warung, a small Indonesian restaurant next to the rice paddies. I spent my morning wandering, looking for accommodation, trying with all my might to keep my spirits up. I left the place I was staying at 9am and went to a new place I'd found that must be just short of 2km away. I was carrying my 20kg backpack on my back with my smaller one in front of me. It was gruelling work. I thought it was quite funny that I thought it so gruelling, and pushed myself through it, waving aside offers of taxi and motorbike services. I was going to do this myself. You can imagine my disappointment when I arrived at my new 'homestay' to find that the nice room I had seen the day before had been taken and I was shown to a not so nice room - please note my euphemism. I couldn't bear the thought of finding another place to stay, my hips screaming like old women at the very idea.

After bargaining the man down and ensuring breakfast in the morning, I set out for another home-hunting adventure. I walked up a road until I realized that it was too far for me to live anyway and so walked down it, taking a small road to the right which led me down a hill and up the other side. There was a small waterfall doing its thing as I climbed up some stepping stone steps. When I reached the top I realized the path stopped and that I would have to go back. I was feeling quite defeated at this point and saddened by the thought that I would never find a place to live. I took a deep breath and told myself to sit down, enjoy the peace and quiet and just do what I came to Bali to do - chill out a bit.

I climbed up the steps of a rickety looking structure on the edge of the rice field. I realized that my mind was so busy trying to find a home that I was ignoring the reality of my situation. I am in Bali! I am in Ubud! I am sitting, all alone, at the edge of a rice paddy. Isn't that marvellous?! Aren't I on an adventure? Isn't that why I'm here? I need to take a break, quieten my mind and listen to myself - for the first time ever I'm the person who is making all the rules, but I'm so busy chaotically thinking that I'm not being clear with my instructions. Clear Instructions! One of the mantras of teaching, and yet I'm not allowing myself the teacher to teach myself the student appropriately...get what I mean?

With these musings I saw a path of flattened grass to the right, and decided that I should take it. Soon my shoes were off, squelching through the muddy paths of the rice paddies, scaring the ducks away and watching delightedly as they quacked and waddled away from me making duck-feet-in-water noises. Isn't this so lovely? Those ducks are so darn cute and useful, eating all the rice bugs. I was so grateful to be doing what I'd come here to do - to just explore and wander through the rice paddies. I'm so thankful that I can do this while feeling so safe and welcome, the workers in the field waving me on, smiling and not minding that I was shepherding their ducks in the wrong direction. A man showed me a path that goes along the stream and one which will get me back, eventually, to the main road. He told me how the birds and butterflies are beautiful in this jungle place in the morning and that he comes to paint them. I think I'll have to take an early morning adventure to this very spot.